When the instructor asked for a volunteer, there was silence. So, I took a breath and said, “I’ll do it.”
With my heart pounding in my ears, I followed her instructions and tried not to think about how ridiculous I was sounding. I tried to forget everyone was hearing me stumbling for words as she and I went through the exercise together.
The thing was: I knew who many of these women were. This was in the early days of Facebook, and I’d looked through their profiles leading up to the start of the class. Since we were going to be together for several months, I wanted to get an idea of who my fellow classmates were.
They were an accomplished bunch! I could clearly see that most were much further along than I was.
NGL: I was pretty intimidated by what I found.
I didn’t think I had anything to offer. In fact, I felt pretty sure I’d be invisible in the group.
But there was one difference.
I got visible, immediately.
When the leader asked for a volunteer the first day … I said YES.
From that moment on, others in the class privately sought out my opinions on the subjects we covered. They wanted my perspective.
I asked a few of them why they wanted my feedback. They didn’t really know, they said they could just feel that I “knew my stuff.”
My interpretation was a bit different. I eventually decided that they saw me as confident/accomplished simply because I was the first to volunteer.
Seriously. That’s all I did differently than anyone else in the class.
What I’ve learned since then is that the confidence we see in others is often an illusion … at first. It’s simply a willingness to be momentarily bold.
But then that boldness turns into confidence.
Confidence is build with awkward action.
For me: that one moment of courage in that class resulted in so many good things, including even client referrals.
Once they started seeing me in that way, I began seeing myself in that way too. This is how the confidence muscle grows. You take the action and then you begin to see yourself as the person who — of course — takes that kind of action. It becomes part of your identity.
Your identity is a creation made up of your thoughts and actions. You build it day by day.
That means it’s malleable. If something isn’t working, you get a do-over. Because you can change it at any time.
Confidence begins with one single moment of awkward courage. And then you begin to create the thoughts that start shifting how you see yourself.
But it all starts with one single action.
What one awkwardly courageous thing can you do today for your business? Or better yet, right now?
Do that.
You’ve got this!
XX Piper
PS: Want to unlock your sales confidence so you can do more of the work you love? Grab the Sales Confidence Quiz! It’s a free resource I made just for you.
